The other night I had dinner at my aunt and uncle’s house. Sitting around the table were representatives of four generations: one Traditionalist (aka the Silent Generation); two Baby Boomers; two Gen Xers; and two Gen Zers. Glaringly missing was a Millennial but I was informed the next day when I told my daughter about it that she would be more than happy to represent her generation at a future family dinner.
Many aspects of this gathering fascinated me. The one that stood out more than the others, however, is how all of us at that table -- with our range of ages from 7 to 83 -- are now operating not just in the natural world, which is governed by its own set of laws we can’t dispute, but also in a world ruled by technology -- specifically the Internet -- which doesn’t (yet) have a collective set of laws everyone:
a. knows;
b. understands: and
c. well, we aren’t even at c yet
Gravity is gravity, after all.
But not on the Internet.
Generational
So goes the Internet, so goes our lives regardless of what year you were born.
Everyone alive today is influenced by this thing that no one can see but dominates many aspects of our lives. Whether we want to be operating in a world ruled by the Internet or not has no bearing.
It’s a fact.
Some of us at that table that night remember life before the Internet. My cousin’s kids, who are 11 and 7 respectively, do not. They will be the first generation to grow up truly digi-native (I think that’s a term?), meaning people who only know life with the Internet in it.
Fully immersed.
From day one.
They don't have iPhones yet. But they’ve seen YouTube and Instagram. They use laptops, computers, and tablets every day at school.
Essentially, they know about all of the Internet’s shiny, magical portals taking you to wherever, whenever and with whomever you want.
But -- and this is a big one -- they are being taught by non digi-natives, people who remember life before so many young women are surgically altering their face so they look like a Snapchat filter or one of the Kardashians. They remember life before our phone has more value with a state of the art camera on it than its ability to call and talk to someone.
No matter how hard parents may try to either shield their children from the Internet, or give them free reign as the case may be because their thinking goes, they might as well learn it now, it’s impossible not to acknowledge one very important variable in this entire Internet equation:
There. Is. No. Universal. Manual.
Not for 83 year olds. Not for 46 year olds. Certainly not for 11 year olds.
In many ways, we are still making this up as we go along.
No One Handed Us a Manual
Do you remember the first time you sat down to use the Internet?
I do. I was teaching high school English at the time. It was the mid-90s and I already knew my students knew more about this wild thing than I or any of my colleagues did because I’d seen groups of them gathered around clunky laptops on the floor gawking at their screens. A palpable buzz filled the air. We all knew things were going to be different from now on. We just didn’t know how different things would be.
What didn’t happen that day was getting a pamphlet, playbook, or sheet of paper with stick figure drawings on it walking me through how this thing works.
It came with no operating instructions.
Still doesn’t. Not in any organized way, anyway.
As such, there is no turning to page 17, section C, sub point 4.9 that instructs us what to do when we accidentally stumble onto a site with images we now can’t unsee.
There is no index guiding us toward the chapter on how not to get sucked into the death scroll on social media to the point where despair fills every cell in our body.
No, here's how to think about this place you are about to enter and you have no idea where you’re going to end up and oh, just so you know? There are no rules and no one else seems to know what they're doing but hey. It’s new and it’s cool and everyone’s doing it so go for it!
Every one of us has had to figure it out on our own to one degree or another.
And it hasn’t always gone smoothly.
Of course, plenty of books are available now about how to use the Internet including Internet for Dummies. And for digi-natives like Emily and Graham, just Google it is the default response to any question we have about anything.
Were We Sold Snake Oil?
The body of research continues to grow about the many ways constant exposure to information via the Internet is affecting us humans. Specifically, how the never-ending barrage of stuff coming at us from all directions affects our ability to think, feel, and act ethically, responsibly, and humanely towards ourselves and others.
In his book Silicon Snake Oil: Second Thoughts on the Information Highway, Clifford Stoll writes:
"The brave new world of cyber-glop will be an increasingly lonely, isolated and dehumanized world. It will be a place where you can order anything you want online, but you don’t know your neighbors, where your children and your parents will spend evening hours logged into the Net, talking to distant strangers rather than each other."
At first glance, you might think Stoll wrote those words yesterday, not in 1996, nearly thirty years ago, when his book was published.
Even now, 26 years after the fact, his predictions are chillingly on point. The rest of his book may have become obsolete long ago as is the fate of many tech books. But this particular observation about the Internet fostering loneliness, isolation, and dehumanization has indeed become our reality, particularly in the wake of the pandemic.
A Question for Leadership
Information goes only so far. Without a broader context, without conversation and connection and perspective, the information we find can influence our thinking in numerous ways.
Some of them useful. Many of them not.
While I can find fantastic recipes for bread online, what I won’t find is anything about that instant when I will know I've kneaded the bread long enough. Getting driving directions online is great, until I realize that construction or an accident is blocking my intended route and I can't figure out how to get around it because I don't have an actual paper map. Kids learning how to use computers is great, but when they can't do basic arithmetic or talk in complete sentences while looking someone in the eye, how can we justify the way monies are allocated in education these days?
What kind of world do we want to build?
I am not anti-Internet. Far from it. The Internet has added more to my life than taken away.
However, I think we can agree -- the Internet can’t be left to its own devices. It shouldn’t be locked down or controlled by a singular governing body. But, it also shouldn't be a free-for-all without consequences or accountability. Like all us mere mortals, clear boundaries and self-discipline need to be in place.
This is an enormous task, one people far smarter than I work on every day.
Regardless of what field or industry we represent, an important question leaders must ask today is this:
How do we develop the capacity for living simultaneously in two worlds -- the virtual world (where seemingly anything goes) and the natural world (where universal laws rule the roost) so that our lives are rich, healthy, and satisfying without destroying the planet or each other?
Meeting at the Intersection
At the intersection of these two worlds is where we find ourselves right now. Taking the time to have meaningful conversations that inspire action toward this aim is imperative if we honestly want to make the world a better place while saving it from old models of thinking.
The existence of this thing called the Internet, let alone all the tools that have since been created so that we can use it, is arguably the most significant advancement humans have made since discovering fire. The power it has had and continues to impart on advancing culture at a rapid and sometimes dangerous rate cannot be underestimated or taken for granted.
The Internet is a tremendous gift. It also presents an enormous leadership problem, one I’m confident we can solve if we take the time to put our minds to it, talk to one another, and take action accordingly. Like all growth, it won’t happen overnight. Nor will it always be smooth. But we can find our way forward in ways that make an impact and a difference if we are willing to invest in those conversations.
