Finding purpose in your life can be as tricky as finding your eyeglasses when they are stuck on top of your head: sometimes it is so obvious, you miss it altogether. And the sad reality is, millions of people miss fulfilling their life’s purpose because they are too busy doing other things. They never slow down long enough to discover what is right in front of them.

You may be one of these people. In fact, if you are like the majority of Americans, chances are good that you would answer no to the following question:

Have you found your life’s purpose?

With best sellers like Rick Warren’s The Purpose Driven® Life: What on Earth Am I Here For? topping Amazon’s charts, it is clear that many, many people are searching for their purpose in life.

So why do so many people struggle with finding purpose?

One explanation can be found in our culture. American culture is steeped in principles of materialism vs. purpose driven pursuits. From a young age, we are taught by the culture at large to go to school and get a job so we can consume lots of stuff and keep the economy sound. So much of our time on earth is spent devoted to chasing the almighty dollar and keeping up with the proverbial Joneses that we never discover, cultivate, or live out our passions.

A culture that worships money and getting ahead is in direct conflict with the desires many people feel to live our purpose. In fact, millions of people wrestle for years with the “want tos” and the “shoulds.”

We hear ourselves saying, “I want to be a teacher, but I should stay with my job here at Company X because the pay is so great.”

“I want to start my own business, but I should toe the line because going out on my own is risky.”

Do those sound familiar?

Indeed, millions of people get so caught up in the rat race, we never slow down long enough to ask if what we are doing is truly what we desire to do. Let alone ask if what we are doing matters or has meaning. And this endless pursuit of money becomes trying, tiresome, and downright empty at some point for many. We wonder if finding your purpose in life is even possible.

The truth is, humans are hard-wired for helping. For philanthropy. For altruism. Giving is in our nature. We not only want our lives to have purpose, we need our lives to have purpose. It’s almost like breathing. This explains why so many people who have found their purpose in life will say things such as:

“I was suffocating before I found my purpose. I can’t imagine ever going back to that stranglehold.”

The good news is that finding purpose in your life doesn’t have to be a struggle. Sometimes all it takes is slowing down long enough to recognize that your eye glasses are on top of your head, not lost in the couch cushions or under the seat of the car.

Give yourself the gift of an hour of uninterrupted quiet time and make a list of all the things that matter to you. Don’t stop until you have at least 50. 100 would be even better. Somewhere on that list will be your purpose. It may not be immediately obvious, but something on that list has you one step closer to finding purpose in your life.

And that one step can change everything.

About

Mary Lou Kayser

Mary Lou Kayser is a bestselling author, poet, and host of the Play Your Position podcast. Over the course of her unique career, she has influenced thousands of people to become more powerful as leaders, writers, and thinkers in their respective professional practices. She writes, teaches, and speaks about universal insights, ideas, and observations that empower audiences worldwide how to bet on themselves.

  • Alot of good points here. Coming to the realization that purpose is more important than simply existing as another cog in the machine is a powerful thing, both as an individual enlightenment and as it applies to the overall state of human community.

    Capitalist culture, especially as it exists in america, perpetuates accomplishment through economic success almost invariably at the expense of self and while this dichotomy is only a tangent in the arguement of purpose vs. materialism it is a meaningful and important one.

    The ‘slowing down’ you describe is a very important in understanding purpose and living a richer and more meaningful life in general. Establishing this ‘pause’ in our minds and in our lifestyles is the beginning of unlocking the doors to wisdom and kindness.

  • Hello Mary Lou
    The end of next month I turn 53 and I think I may be one of those unfortunate souls who has not found their purpose yet. I used to think I knew but I didn’t, all I knew was working and getting stuff then work more and get more stuff. I’ve started to realize lately that there must be more than that, I just haven’t figured it out yet.

    I’m going to try your 1 hour exercise, I’ll let you know how it turns out.

  • Hi Mary Lou,
    Absolutely true about discovering your purpose. It took me many years to wake up and realize I do have a choice & the power to step into it. All I an say is, there’s no time like the present for taking the time to discover your purpose. Your life takes on a whole new meaning once you open up to the possibilities before you.

    Great reminder to just go for it!
    Val 😉
    Val’s last blog…Where Did THAT Come From? http://www.valwilcox.com/where-did-that-come-from

  • Hey Val, I completely agree with you: there is no time like RIGHT NOW to take action steps toward living a more fulfilling and purpose-filled life. The joy you exude to the world every day shows that you have taken the steps and are now manifesting the work you were meant to do! Keep on going, lady! 🙂

  • Finding purpose can take half a life, but perhaps that’s all part of the grand plan. Once you find it, nothing will stop you from living full out! Wishing you the best on your journey, Mark. Thanks for sharing your story with us.

  • There is definitely an inherent conflict between capitalist culture as it is practiced here in America and the desire for true purpose and fulfillment. What’s interesting to note is that many people who choose an austere life often came from indulgence and extravagance. And some folks who only knew poverty and lack as children grow up to be very, very wealthy and make no apologies for the lifestyle they live that money affords them.

    With the majority somewhere in between this spectrum of experiences, coming to terms with who we are and what we are here to do can only manifest once we slow down long enough to truly “see.” Wisdom and kindness can — and does — come from this place. Thank goodness! Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Josh. Much appreciated! 🙂

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